Today I dropped the top to my moisturizer and it rolled under the bed.
After a 47 second rescue mission my brain immediately aborts rational thought and turns to salvage mode.
Maybe I can fashion a new top out of press 'n seal and a rubber band.
No, on second thought, I'll just set this small bottle of finger nail polish remover on the top until I can MacGyver a new one.
How hard would it have been to pull out a few boxes to find the actual top?
Only a normal person with normal thought processes would know.
In other news, I cannot stop pooping.
I switched medications of myself because I'm way too lazy and cheap to go back to the doctor.
Plus, last time I was there, a 65 yr. old man fell out dead and soiled himself right in front of me.
I like to think it was an uncomfortable situation for the both of us.
Anyway, I've been taking mystery meds from the back of the cabinet.
Smart? No. Cheap? Yes.
Turns out...all cheap will get you on a Saturday night is the never ending urge to vomit and a dire case of the free shits.
And, depending upon rather or not you live in rural Mississippi, herpes.
After a 47 second rescue mission my brain immediately aborts rational thought and turns to salvage mode.
Maybe I can fashion a new top out of press 'n seal and a rubber band.
No, on second thought, I'll just set this small bottle of finger nail polish remover on the top until I can MacGyver a new one.
How hard would it have been to pull out a few boxes to find the actual top?
Only a normal person with normal thought processes would know.
In other news, I cannot stop pooping.
I switched medications of myself because I'm way too lazy and cheap to go back to the doctor.
Plus, last time I was there, a 65 yr. old man fell out dead and soiled himself right in front of me.
I like to think it was an uncomfortable situation for the both of us.
Anyway, I've been taking mystery meds from the back of the cabinet.
Smart? No. Cheap? Yes.
Turns out...all cheap will get you on a Saturday night is the never ending urge to vomit and a dire case of the free shits.
And, depending upon rather or not you live in rural Mississippi, herpes.

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